Seven Reasons You Should Thank A Feminist Today

4 Jul

If there is one thing in this world that makes me want to chew my own face off, it’s women who think that feminism has ruined their lives.

You know the type – women who want to live in some kind of souped up 1950s fantasy world where they get married right out of high school and their husband makes enough to support their family on just his income and they think the moral decline of society has something to do with the fact that women no longer wear crinolines and genteel white gloves and cute little hats. Never mind that, you know, lots and lots of families in the 1950s weren’t able to live off of a single income; trust me when I say that feminism did not invent the working mother. Leaving that little scrap of truth aside, I guess I can see what some women find appealing about this model. They want to live in a world where there were fewer expectations put on women – and lord knows that in this day and age, when women often work full time jobs outside of the home and yet are still expected to do the majority of the housework and childcare, the idea that there was a time when you only needed to be pretty and fertile might seem downright relaxing. I guess.

Of course, many women were miserable back then, and the feminine mystique and blah blah blah. I’m not going to get into all that Betty Friedan second wave fun here, but feel free to look it up if you don’t believe me. Life for women back then was like a fancy chocolate with some gross shit inside – really pretty to look at, but best left in the box so that some other sucker who HASN’T read the chocolate map gets tricked into eating it. Just kidding. No one should eat that chocolate – it’s a garbage chocolate and should be treated as such.

All that being said, the thing that REALLY makes me howl with exasperation over this time-travel housewife fetishization is that the vast, vast majority of the women who say that they hate feminism seem to be pretty damn happy to reap the benefits of it. So either they’re totally unaware of what feminism is, what it’s done, and how history works, or else they’re just total hypocrite jerks.

If it’s the latter:

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But assuming that for some people it’s the former, here’s a short and totally not exhaustive list of things that they can do because of feminism.

1. Vote

Thanks to those lovely suffragettes, women have the legal right to help decide who runs your country. This means women get an actual say in legislation that directly impacts them and their daily life. THAT IS A REALLY AWESOME THING, regardless of whether or not you, personally, exercise your right to vote.

And just a heads up, I will jump-kick anyone who says that women were “given” the right to vote. No. Women were not given anything. They fought, endured violence, imprisonment and forced-feedings, and sometimes even died for the right to vote. So fuck you to anyone who wants to say otherwise.

Police arresting British suffragette Emmeline Pankurst

Police arresting British suffragette Emmeline Pankurst

2. Own property

Being able to own property is awesome. Being able to inherit property is also awesome. Know why? Because it totally helps you avoid a Sense and Sensibility type situation when you are your husband’s second wife and he totally wants to will everything to you and your daughters, BUT HE LEGALLY CANNOT. And then you have to go live in a cottage and the family that owns the cottage is the most annoying family in the world and then also Willoughby comes along and ruins everything even further. So.

The fact that women can now legally own property straight up means that the government can’t just walk in, take your house away, and give it to a dude (or keep it for themselves). The fact that women can now legally inherit property means that if a you are living in a house that a manly man owns and he wants to give you said house when he dies because he thinks you’re rad and maybe also you have nowhere else to live, he can TOTALLY DO THAT. This is seriously a huge thing and I can’t understand how any woman could be like, “huh, I wish I lived in a time when I could be turned out of my house because my presence has become inconvenient to a dude.”

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3. Have Reproductive Rights

Do you like being able to have any kind of control over your baby-making parts beyond yelling “MAKE SURE YOU PULL OUT IN TIME” when a dude starts making his o-face? Great, then you can thank feminism. Feminists of many stripes have fought long and hard to make sure that women have access to birth control, reproductive healthcare and safe and easy abortion. So unless you’re, like, part of the Quiverfull movement or else a staunch Catholic, you can high five feminism for the fact that you can totally get it on without getting knocked up.

Birth-Control-vintage

4. Wear Pants

Pants are fucking awesome. And let’s not forget about pants’ cute little cousin, shorts. I’m really glad that I can wear pants, because they’re super warm in the winter and they allow me to sit in all kinds of unladylike positions without flashing my junk at everyone. Yay pants! Thank you, feminism, for my pants. I am wearing pants right now – charcoal skinny jeans, to be specific – and I’m just going to have a little moment of silence to express my gratitude for these pants.

One time, back in ye olden days (the 1960s), my grandmother’s boss wouldn’t let any of his female employees wear pants. And my grandmother, bless her, was like, fuck this noise I want to wear some goddamn pants to work. So she took her boss to the Ontario Human Rights Commission and totally won the right to wear pants to work. So if you ever have those days when you just don’t want to wear a skirt, you can totally thank feminism (AND MY GRANDMA) for the fact that you can put on a pair of pants and strut yourself to work.

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5. Get An Education

Remember when we were growing up and our parents were all, “You can be whatever you want when you grow up!”? Well, that’s because of women who braved insults and abuse and alienation and all kinds of other shitty shit in order to be able to go to medical school or law school or like astronaut school or whatever. Women literally sat there in those classrooms and let their classmates and professors treat them like complete dirt in order to get a higher education. And that paved the way for women today being able to pursue any postsecondary studies they want to.

There are still so many girls on this planet who don’t have access to even a grade-school level education. Don’t forget that in some countries girls are threatened with violence or death for attempting to go to school. Stop taking your own education for granted and recognize the fact that thanks, in part, to feminism, you were able to go to, you know, walk into school without worrying about getting shot because you’re a girl.

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6. Work Outside The Home and Be Financially Independent

Whether or not you love your job, the fact that we are able to be respected members of the work force is so fucking important. Even if you’re the world’s happiest stay-at-home mom (and ain’t nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home mom), you should be grateful that, if need be, you could go out and get a job and make your own money. While, as noted above, women working outside the home is nothing new, the fact that they can do that AND be financially independent is. Ladies, you can make your own money and then keep it and choose what you spend it on. I mean, yes, this ties in with the whole idea of women being able to own things, but it’s so damn important it deserves its own entry.

Women need to have the ability to support themselves and their own families – whether they exercise that ability or not. Otherwise, we’re totally dependent on men for, well, everything. If your husband dies or leaves you or it becomes necessary for you to leave, then what the fuck are you going to do if you can’t get a job? So even if you’re not currently financially independent, the fact that you could be is really fucking huge.

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7. Be A Person

You know what’s awesome? Being a full-fledged person in the eyes of the law. I really, really love not being a man’s property. I love having agency. I love being able to make my own decisions. I love that I live in a world where it’s no longer completely 100% legal for a man to rape his wife. Being a person is so fucking rad. And yeah, if you’re a woman, you can fucking thank feminism for the fact that you are legally a person.

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The bottom line is:

I don’t give a fuck if you call yourself a feminist. I mean, you totally should, because feminism is awesome and patriarchy sucks, but you get to make your own choices about how you label yourself. However, I give all the fucks if you think that feminism is useless, or has never accomplished anything or, worse, is somehow responsible for all of your life problems. Because if you value any of the things mentioned above (and, spoiler alert, you should), then you can just give feminism a big old high five. Whether or not you’re a feminist is your own business, but for god’s sake at least acknowledge that you owe a debt of gratitude to the movement for so many of the rights and freedoms that you currently enjoy.

FEMINISM – FUCK YEAH

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91 Responses to “Seven Reasons You Should Thank A Feminist Today”

  1. bookmole July 4, 2014 at 9:29 pm #

    Reblogged this on Bookmole's Blog and commented:
    I remember when I couldn’t get a loan without a responsible person – ie, my husband or my father – to be a guarantor. And I’m coming up sixty. Please, dear god, when Daughter is coming up sixty, we will have got further with this!

    And High Five to Belle’s grandma!

  2. bookmole July 4, 2014 at 9:30 pm #

    Brilliant. Reblogged, shared on fb (I’ll take it down from fb if you want me to!) Your grandma rocks. Is she still alive? (If you have told me that already, sorry for not remembering!)

    • bellejarblog July 4, 2014 at 10:38 pm #

      I’m totally flattered you shared it on FB! My grandmother is totally still alive – she moved to Spain a few years ago because why not? And now she spends her days lounging around a pool, drinking wine, and hanging out with all her ex-pat Brit neighbours.

      • guessingatnormal July 5, 2014 at 8:21 pm #

        I shared this on FB also. Here’s hoping it goes viral up in there! 😀

  3. Shanna July 4, 2014 at 9:35 pm #

    Go Grandma!! That is an awesome family legacy.

  4. swo8 July 4, 2014 at 10:00 pm #

    I’m not sure I would call “all that” feminism. It is really “human rights” for all. My grandmother was a suffragette. No one pushed her around. She was a great role model for me.
    Leslie

    • emkfeminist July 4, 2014 at 10:32 pm #

      Yeah. And women wouldn’t have those human rights if it weren’t for feminism.

      • swo8 July 4, 2014 at 11:25 pm #

        Feminism for sure. There’s no way you can exclude 50% of the population out of their human rights. I attempted to say something to that effect in my song “Ecoutez-moi” in the album Manaus Where Two Rivers Meet. I did it in French because they speak French in many of the north African countries. Let me know if you want a translation and I’ll send it to you.
        Leslie

    • Jessica July 5, 2014 at 7:46 pm #

      Isn’t feminism a branch of human rights?

      • swo8 July 5, 2014 at 8:06 pm #

        Yes it is, but some how, some people like to diminish our rights by calling it feminism.
        Leslie

  5. Beth Caplin July 4, 2014 at 10:02 pm #

    I had to unfollow someone whose purpose for blogging was why she’s not a feminist. Needless to say, I had a slight conniption over that.

    PS. Your grandma sounds awesome!

    • Judithann Campbell July 5, 2014 at 5:03 am #

      Hi! I’m pretty sure that I am the blogger that Beth stopped following. I love the fact that you give men absolutely no credit for anything, even though a super majority of American men freely chose to give-yes, give-women the vote. Those men did not have a gun to their head, nor were they defeated in any battle. We should absolutely thank the early feminists-many of whom were pro-life- but our grandfathers and great grandfathers deserve just as much gratitude. If you give all the credit to women and refuse to thank men for anything, then you are the one who is the ingrate, and people are not treating you unfairly when they say that you are hostile towards men.

      Would it be ok if I reblogged this article? I won’t do it without your permission, but if it’s ok with you, I would like to reblog it, and let the chips fall where they may. 🙂

      • Beth Caplin July 5, 2014 at 4:11 pm #

        Here’s the thing, Judithann. I want to like you. In fact, had we met at the supermarket or a coffee shop or something, I’d probably like you a lot. I’m sure you’re a kind, decent person.

        However, the blatant ignorance of your posts was causing me heart palpitations. I was like you in college: I saw only the negative things about feminism, and as a conservative I would have been insulted to be likened with them in anyway. Then I ended an abusive relationship and my entire perspective changed. So when another woman in particular claims to be anti-feminist, not gonna lie, but my feelings get punched.

      • Judithann Campbell July 5, 2014 at 5:22 pm #

        Beth, I am so sorry that you were in an abusive relationship. Could you be more specific about the “blatant ignorance” of my posts? What, specifically, did you find to be ignorant? If you could provide an exact quote of something I said that was ignorant, that would be great.

      • linddykal July 6, 2014 at 2:05 am #

        You need to educate yourself. Women were not “given” the right to vote. They had been asking since way before The Civil War. Suffragettes were picketing the White House during WWI showing the hypocrisy of fighting for democracy in Europe while it was denied to 50% of the population. They were beaten and stoned on a fairly regular basis.

        The suffragettes were a nuisance and an embarrassment and the President had them arrested even though they were excercising their Freedom of Speech.

        While in prison they began a hunger strike, and began making headlines. To counter this forced feedings were issued. Suffragettes were strapped down, tubes were forced down their throats and stomachs, and raw eggs were poured down.

        The media spread the story and it caused a scandal. To spare further embarrassment, especially during a war, the President passed the law to give women the right to vote.

        No one gave them the right to vote. It was tenaciously fought and bled for, and I’m so grateful and proud of them.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 2:25 am #

        I am not denying the fact that the early feminists- most of whom were pro-life-were admirable people who did great things for all women at great cost to themselves, but you seem to be totally unwilling to give men any credit at all. The president did not single handedly give women the right to vote; that required a constitutional amendment, which required a super majority of men to vote in favor of it: over 2/3 of American men voted to give women the right to vote. Don’t you think those men- our grandfathers and great grandfathers- deserve our thanks as well?

      • Beth Younget July 6, 2014 at 4:14 am #

        In think you are conflating women with feminists, and unnecessarily assuming men are the enemy. Patriarchy and sexism are the problem, including women who have internalized or benefitted from sexism.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 7:00 pm #

        Who are the women who benefit from sexism?

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 5:50 pm #

        The only people I’ve personally met who openly called themselves feminists (indicating activism) were men. Why assume feminists are women?

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 5:56 pm #

        That’s kind of what I have been saying, but a couple of those commenting on this thread seem to be opposed to ever thanking any man for anything.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 6:30 pm #

        No Judith, this is not how your message comes through. You seem pretty set on two teams, while in fact feminism wishes to eradicate the cliff and live as equals. That one gender needs to be thankful to another is indeed supporting a “them versus us” attitude. If you understood gender equality, you wouldn’t say that women need to be grateful to men, but that we all need to be grateful to those working to better our lives. As far as the feminist agenda – I’m grateful to all those who have supported the cause – whether they are men or women – and feminists may be men and women.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 6:51 pm #

        Maybe you are right: maybe I don’t understand gender equality. 🙂 One of the reasons why I get the impression that most feminists are women is because feminists don’t seem to give much attention to male feminists: most if not all feminist books are written by women, and most if not all feminist organizations are led by women. Maybe if feminists put more men in positions of power, people would be more aware of male feminists.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 7:07 pm #

        Yes, women are obviously the greatest beneficiaries of feminism, and therefor make-up the majority of activists. There are men who are feminists, there are women who are feminists, there are men who work against feminism, there are women who work against feminism. Are the bad effects we attribute to feminism actually the result of feminism or is it the result of ignorance, intolerance and societal decay in general? Either way, the concept of feminism still stand in its priori a pure agenda, and to oppose such a pure agenda is to admit to the influence of societal decay.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 7:12 pm #

        Societal decay? Are you, as a feminist, saying that things used to be better in the past? I am not sure what you are saying. You are obviously much smarter than I am. Could you try to put it in simpler terms, that I could understand?

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 7:24 pm #

        Societal decay would represent all that is wrong and perverted in our society, preventing us to gain over-all virtue and thus reap the benefits of common respect and concern from one another.

        To work against anything that strives to accomplish betterment amongst us is cause for great concern and suspicion.

        To deem parts of the feminist movement as corrupted or flawed should be a reason to take up arms FOR its cause – not against it, don’t you think?

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 7:32 pm #

        There are a few women out there who call themselves pro-life feminists; they are trying to take up the cause of feminism even though they see parts of the feminist movement as corrupted and flawed. They are castigated and vilified by the majority of feminists, who say that there is no such thing as pro-life feminism. That is one of the reasons why I don’t identify as a feminist.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 7:55 pm #

        No matter our feelings in regards to legal abortion, we have to recognize that technically, pro-life is not pro-woman or even pro-unborn baby. So, pro-life feminism is sort of an oxymoron, no? I don’t think the pro-life movement is concerned with feminism in general. It’s an ideology.

        But I’m glad we got to the issue behind your bias.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 9:07 pm #

        My bias? Roughly half of all American women are pro-life. When you make it clear to those women that they are not welcome in the feminist movement, you shouldn’t be surprised when they refuse to identify as feminists. They aren’t being unfair to you: you have told them to stay away, and they are respecting your wishes.

        A common theme on this thread seems to be that feminists are perfect in every way, and nothing is ever their fault: everything is always somebody else’s fault. If it makes you feel better to think that everyone who opposes abortion is just out to get women, then go on telling yourself that, but you aren’t doing your cause any favors.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 9:32 pm #

        Now Judith, let’s not get confused – feminists are not perfect, and I’m sure they are aware of that – but feminism is a virtuous cause.

        I think that most women are feminist, but don’t share all of its applications. Some are still willing to sacrifice female human rights issues over what they think holds a higher purpose, as in abortion rights. No matter how you argue, you cannot claim pro-life to be pro-women, only that you believe “saving” the fetus holds a higher priority, right?

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 10:29 pm #

        Jessica, all of us believe that the causes we support are virtuous. I am not going to get into a debate about abortion: it’s been debated a million times in a million places and neither of us will say anything that hasn’t been said a million times before. The subject of this post was women who don’t show enough gratitude to feminists: when you demonize half the female population for being pro-life, you shouldn’t be perplexed when they refuse to support you. When your response to people who disagree with you is “What the fuck is wrong with you”-which is the first thing said in this post, you shouldn’t be surprised when women don’t want to be associated with you. But you are clearly not open to hearing these things, so I’m going to go now.

        And yes, I believe that the life of a fetus takes precedence over the convenience of a woman. About half of American women agree with me about that.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 10:10 pm #

        Beth, no one is pro-abortion. The two major teams are as thus: ideology versus most favorable outcome. If you read on, you’ll see that I’m separating the abortion issue from feminism in that you can be a feminist according to different ideas and applications thereof. But I stand by my point – pro-life is not pro-woman (or pro-unborn baby), it is simply the belief that “saving” the unborn child out-ranks the rights of the woman. If you think there’s a way around this, please explain.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 10:46 pm #

        Thank you, Beth, for defending my name 🙂 It’s ok, though: when you have an unusual and long name like mine, everybody shortens it. It’s fine, but thank you 🙂

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 10:52 pm #

        Judith, you introduced abortion to the discussion – not I. I have not dismissed half of the female population as dismissed by feminists – you have.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 11:15 pm #

        Jessica, feminists have a long history of being very dismissive of any woman who doesn’t agree with them about everything. Betty Friedan demonized housewives; Gloria Steinem said that Sandra Day O’Connor, who supported abortion, was “without a uterus” because she disagreed with feminists about something, I can’t remember what. You may not agree with feminist leaders who are dismissive of other women, but they are the voice of feminism that most people hear.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 11:18 pm #

        Sarah Palin is totally feminist in every respect except for the fact that she is pro-life. Feminists totally dismissed her. You may not dismiss her, but most feminists do.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 11:22 pm #

        Judith, you told me that about half of the women in this country are dismissed by feminists due to their pro-life support. I explained why that might be so, and you agreed that “saving” the fetus took a higher priority over feminist values.

        I’m glad I could help – you’re welcome!

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 11:39 pm #

        Ok, so first you deny that feminists dismiss women who don’t agree with them about everything, and now you are saying that feminists are totally justified in dismissing any woman who disagrees with them. And you are totally mystified about why so many women want nothing to do with feminism.

        Good luck, Jessica, it’s been nice conversing with you.

      • Jessica July 6, 2014 at 11:47 pm #

        No Judith, you suggested all those things, and admitted to being mystified by them. I’m glad I could help you sort it out. 🙂

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 11:52 pm #

        Whatever, Jessica 🙂

      • Annie Mouse July 7, 2014 at 12:03 am #

        Judithann, make no mistake; Sarah Palin is no feminist. Sarah Palin is for nothing more than Sarah Palin.

      • wobh July 7, 2014 at 4:45 am #

        Those who use unearned power and privilege to do justice to the oppressed deserve neither gratitude nor reward; they are merely returning stolen goods.

    • Jessica July 5, 2014 at 7:48 pm #

      There’s this trend right now to loathe feminism. So sad.

      • Judithann Campbell July 6, 2014 at 5:18 pm #

        @Beth Younget: who are the women who benefit from sexism?

      • Beth Caplin July 6, 2014 at 9:53 pm #

        “No matter our feelings in regards to legal abortion, we have to recognize that technically, pro-life is not pro-woman or even pro-unborn baby. So, pro-life feminism is sort of an oxymoron, no?”

        I’m sorry, what? I thought this thread was about dismantling stereotypes, and you just painted all pro-lifers as anti-feminist? Why is this? I’m pro-life but much of what the pro-life movement has become disgusts me, and I want to see a world where the need for an abortion is less, as I’m sure you do. I also want to see a world where people care about babies after they are born, not just in the womb.

        And her name is Judithann, not Judith. It’s all one word, see? It’s disrespectful to shorten someone’s name without asking permission first.

      • linddykal July 7, 2014 at 11:09 pm #

        SARAH PALIN is a feminist?!?!?! I’m sorry. That’s absurd.

      • Beth Caplin July 8, 2014 at 4:16 pm #

        Where are you getting the idea, period, that pro-life is never pro-woman? You said you weren’t making the argument that feminists can’t be pro-life, and then completely backtracked by saying the whole movement values the unborn baby over the woman. That’s precisely what I’m trying to argue against here. Pro-life isn’t really pro-life if one life is valued more than another. I’m sad that people find it shocking to be pro woman and pro baby.

        And Judithann, I got annoyed for you because my full name is Sarahbeth and I hate having to correct people constantly.

  6. syrbal-labrys July 4, 2014 at 10:08 pm #

    Yes, rather like the folks screaming about the evil communist labor unions that gave them a five day work week, minimum wage, and so forth. In high school I took a petition around to then present to the school board, to win the right to wear pants to school. It was the first years of high energy costs (late 60’s/early 70’s) and it was freezing MISERY in a skirt in the school. The rule got changed, too. The male Principal never forgave me….

    • Nerija S. July 5, 2014 at 11:03 am #

      Awesome! Heh, that poor, poor principal who had to see all those female students in pants. Oh, the horror!

      The only thing people at my high school could really complain about was not being allowed to wear shorts before May… funny thing, I remember an op-ed in our school paper that noted how at least girls had the option of wearing skirts when it was warm in April (this was in no way a comment against girls wearing pants, btw), while all the guys had to wait until May to bare their legs.

    • Jessica July 5, 2014 at 7:55 pm #

      Syrbal, I thought of that example as well – anti-labor unions while enjoying their weekends off etc. So many people hate activism all together, while enjoying the perks that activism has birthed.

  7. Dee Jae Cox July 4, 2014 at 10:12 pm #

    I really love your blog. And I especially loved this post. Thank you for your honesty and willingness to put it out there!!!

  8. emilyjbarber July 4, 2014 at 11:09 pm #

    My friend at uni said she was an equalist, not a feminist. We argued about this of course. Changing the name as if to apologise?!!! Bollox. Never quite grasped feministphobia. It’s a funny thing not to see how ‘image’ of feminism is twisted and manipulated in order to cover up the shame of patriarchal values. As ever, a grand piece of point of view. How many of our grandmas did stuff we don’t know about I wonder, hmmm. Ta! X

  9. linddykal July 5, 2014 at 12:46 am #

    I love that my paycheck doesn’t get deposited straight into my husband’s account.

    Btw anyone who doesn’t know about suffrage needs to watch the 2004 movie Iron Jawed Angels.

    • jen July 5, 2014 at 4:04 pm #

      some of this still happens. Several (maybe ten) years ago I have 30 thou in the bank from an inheritance. My husband went over and had his name put on the account, without my knowledge. AND THEY LET HIM!!! so don’t let your guard down ladies!!!

  10. izzy82 July 5, 2014 at 2:09 am #

    Wozers, I’ve never heard anyone say women were “given” the right to vote – that would REALLY irk me! I did, however, have another blogger totally bash one of my posts and tell me that patriarchy is what made rape and sexual assault illegal… I was like “nope, pretty sure patriarchy created rape and feminists fought back and pushed for it to be illegal.”

  11. Lysa July 5, 2014 at 2:28 am #

    awesome…as usual

    • jennieeechennie July 5, 2014 at 4:41 am #

      Wow, your pants petition as well as Belle’s aforementioned grandmother story surprised me. Having been born in the late 90’s, I never imagined a time when you couldn’t wear jeans or pants to school/work. I guess it’s something I’ve been taking for granted all along!

      • Annie Mouse July 7, 2014 at 12:06 am #

        In the early 1980s, in my high school, girls had to fight for the right to take computer science classes. The reason? Boys would need those classes to get good jobs to support their families, and besides, girl-brains were incapable of understanding how computers worked.

  12. On the Couch with Dr. Barnard July 5, 2014 at 3:11 am #

    Thank you for once again sharing something so insightful.

  13. Samantha July 5, 2014 at 3:13 am #

    *wild applause*

    Yes, all of this.

  14. OrbitalElements July 5, 2014 at 3:30 am #

    Yes, this! I am so grateful to the women who came before us and fought the good fight, and really hope I can do something in my lifetime to make it an even better (and more equal) world for my daughter. Starting with explaining to everyone who will remotely listen that feminism is not a dirty word and that wanting equality, fair treatment, and the right to keep what I earn are not bad things. I love this blog!

  15. blueneely July 5, 2014 at 5:02 am #

    very well put. Women back then fought for all those things and that is why women today live as they please. What bothers me though, is the same women fighting for rights today judge other women’s choices. In my experience, working women often do not respect women who chose to stay home with their children and rely on their husbands for bread earning. All women should feel free and not guilty or scrutinized for their choices whether that be staying at home or working or doing both. Not every woman can be a “super woman” and that is ok too. There is way too much on our plates anyways as you mentioned.

    • Annie Mouse July 7, 2014 at 12:09 am #

      Interesting. I’ve had quite the opposite life experience; working women are constantly being put down by stay-at-home women because obviously a woman who would go out and work must obviously hate their children (who are in school all day anyway) and are “lazy”, because of course no working woman ever come home from a full day of work and cook dinner, help with homework, do housework, and run children to various events. @@

      • blueneely July 7, 2014 at 3:50 pm #

        And that’s exactly why the judgement of women by other women (working or not working) should stop. Everyone should be able to make their own choice and not feel guilty about it. 🙂

  16. MarinaSofia July 5, 2014 at 6:36 am #

    I remember doing interviews once with some women who were members in a rather patriarchal Japanese new religion (or cult, I suppose you could call it) and they were trying to change the system from within, to have more equal rights for women. But when I suggested that they were feminists, they indignantly refuted it: ‘We don’t have hairy armpits and we wear lipstick!’ Since when did feminism get such a distorted image? Most outrageous!

    • AMM July 6, 2014 at 1:28 pm #

      “Since when did feminism get such a distorted image?

      Since the very start of feminism. Every attempt by women to obtain equal rights in some area, or to simply oppose the tides of misogyny, has been met with ridicule and lies from the Wise Heads of the time. (I think this dates back at least to medieval times.)

      All the sources of information, aside from direct woman-to-woman communication (which is disparaged as “girl talk”), are controlled by Patriarchy — specifically by people who have an interest in maintaining Patriarchy — and they have always dismissed, ridiculed, and distorted feminists and their positions and goals. The exact form of the lies and distortions varies with time, but the goal has always been the same: to convince everyone (women especially) that you’d have to be a “crazy” weirdo to be a feminist (or suffragette, or whatever feminists were called at the time) or even just to agree with anything they say.

      • AMM July 6, 2014 at 1:31 pm #

        [Apologies! blockquote fail. Blockquote should have ended after the first sentence.]

  17. Amanda Martin (writermummy) July 5, 2014 at 7:44 am #

    Reblogged this on writermummy and commented:
    A masterful rant (I love this blog!) – with some swearing…

  18. Jessie Stracener July 5, 2014 at 11:46 am #

    Reblogged this on The Creative Ginger Tree and commented:
    Yep. She said it!

  19. Jessie Stracener July 5, 2014 at 11:52 am #

    This is awesome! Thank you for anothe

  20. Nerija S. July 5, 2014 at 12:09 pm #

    I recently bought an old Sherlock Holmes series — black-and-white, with Ron Howard and H. Marion Crawford as Holes and Watson — and although it was mostly awesome, there was one episode called something like “The Forgetful Suffragette.” It was actually generally positive toward the suffragettes’ aims (it ended with Inspector Lestrade saying he was going to put in his word for women’s right to vote…though it was pretty much just so they’d shut up already), but it portrayed them as really airheaded. It showed a group of suffragettes at a meeting, trying to decide how they could get people’s attention for their cause, and they just had no idea what to do. “Oh, I know! Maybe we could bomb something!” “But what?” “Oh! What about lions!” “Lions?” “Those stone lions by the park.” “Oh yes, that’ll send a message!”

    Then again, even just a few years ago there was an episode of some sitcom where a husband was throwing a hissy fit about his wife wanting to go back to school to study psychology instead of just being happy with her small bookkeeping job, because dammit who was going to do all the housework and look after the kids and all that, and how could she be so selfish? (because God forbid a man should have to help out with any home or child-related things) He actually said something like, “The man lays down the law in the house!”

    The worst thing, though, was that the show then went on to portray the wife as goofy and airheaded while she was doing her classwork. She was just so goshdarn fascinated by all the concepts she was learning that she started “diagnosing” her family members — like when the teenage daughter asked what the mom thought of a particular lipstick color, the mom started rambling all excitedly about how caring about lipstick was a sign of low self-esteem and would eventually lead to suicide and wasn’t that interesting? and the daughter just walked away in tears (and that wasn’t the only dig at psychology — the husband had actually tried taking the wife to a psychiatrist over her defiance of his No School For You rule, and while the psychiatrist did say a few important things re: the husband thinking the whole world revolved around him, it somehow transitioned into some blubbering rant about the doctor’s mommy issues)

    Basically, the show was trying to make some statement about women’s rights, but then undermined that by portraying the woman as bumbling, while the “rational” husband tried to deal with her letting the house turn into a pigsty and ignoring the kids. Because, again, it’s not like the man could possibly fold some laundry or interact more with the kids… though, he does in the end make a small concession about how maybe he could help out around the house, and isn’t he being so nice to compromise like that?

    *headdesk*

  21. Alice July 5, 2014 at 2:48 pm #

    I totally get your frustration. I myself had discussions with women who do not seem to understand that if it weren’t for feminism, they wouldn’t be able to use that damn laptop to post their stupid ideas; they’d be waiting by the stove for the husband to come home. The sad thing is it’s difficult to change this kind of thinking. You sum up the main arguments very well, but I’m not sure what goes through the mind of a person who thinks the 50s were better for women when reading these lines.

  22. phthalyl July 5, 2014 at 3:30 pm #

    Yes!

  23. Beth Berger July 5, 2014 at 7:58 pm #

    Awesome list; beautifully written!

  24. Jessica July 5, 2014 at 8:08 pm #

    In a recent FB debate, feminists were accused of judging men by the bad examples of a few, so I asked why they were judging feminists by the bad example of a few.

    It’s important to separate feminism as a priory concept to that of the effects of feminism. And if we are to judge the effects of feminism (as a posteriori), we’ll have to consider all of the empirical considerations. It should be blatantly obvious whether the results of the feminist movement has brought more privilege and improvement rather than not, as demonstrated by the great examples given in this blog.

    Thanks for an awesome article Belle!

  25. M T McGuire July 5, 2014 at 8:53 pm #

    Top post. Loved it. Thanks.

  26. jodiethalegend July 6, 2014 at 4:32 am #

    Another brilliant post, I love reading your stuff 🙂
    Ever since I realised the significance of my ex complaining about how he couldn’t understand what my problem was because he thought I should be grateful that he ‘gave’ me freedom (in actual fact, he picked and chose what ‘freedoms’ he ‘gave’ me, and there was always a price that I had to pay), I get a little bubble of rage every time I read about men ‘giving’ women anything that should not have been denied of them in the first place. Who ‘gave’ men the right to vote? Who ‘gave’ them the right to own property? Nobody, they just took it for granted that they could have it and it was their right. And they decided that women could not have those things. Why should women be grateful for that?

    • Patsy Gardiner August 14, 2014 at 11:31 pm #

      You are so right on. I’m 65 and have been battling that very ideology since I was tiny – especially when I was told I couldn’t do something boys could do because I was a girl. Never ever set right with me. I’m so encouraged by this blog and the women who make the comments.

  27. mfennvt July 6, 2014 at 6:34 pm #

    Been proud to call myself a feminist since I was 15. Greatest f-word ever!

  28. Louria Purkeypile July 6, 2014 at 9:01 pm #

    Thank you. I loved this……Judithann just shut up.

    • Judithann Campbell July 7, 2014 at 12:21 am #

      I am more than happy to respect your wishes and go away: I am so, so sorry for saying things that you don’t want to hear.

  29. ladymirth July 7, 2014 at 7:42 am #

    Love the article but Judithann being a strawmanning ignorant idiot harshed my buzz. I love how people like her think they are special snowflakes who care about ALL PEOPLE with special snowflake arguments they have thought up in their own dear little heads. When actually they are giant ignoramouses who don’t even understand the ABCs of oppression much less feminism. And don’t get that we are sick of having to rebut the same old tired appalling shit over and over again. But of course, they never think they can be wrong because as far they are concerned, they are Kind And Intelligent People Who Are Open To Dialogue, unlike meanie-head liberals who just don’t want to hear anything against our “agenda”.

  30. Rachna July 7, 2014 at 9:36 am #

    Reblogged this on Creations Galore! and commented:
    I have been having a lot of thoughts on this issue, especially in the past week after reading a few well written articles. But by the time I write something coherently putting together the fits of rage, I think this article deserves to be read, and the comments following it.

  31. Tiffany R July 7, 2014 at 11:40 am #

    Love it! Sharing on my FB feed.

  32. princessbunnycakes July 8, 2014 at 4:08 am #

    I’ve given this a lot of thought, and I think it would be WONDERFUL if, economically, contemporary society could transform into single-income households. Or part-time-working households. This isn’t to say that I wish it was the cultural norm for women to stay home. I just mean that in a two-adult household, either one of those adults stays home or both adults only work part time. I don’t care if it’s the man or the woman or the transgender unicorn, but both adults shouldn’t be working full time. Because, quite frankly, I don’t like the idea of all-consuming, identity-creating careers and would much rather put in my hours, then be able to think critically, be creative, and pursue a non-money-driven passion in my free time. Aside from that, I simply don’t see how it’s possible to work standard full time hours and complete basic human functions such as laundry, cleaning the bathroom, seeing one’s children, going outside, eating meals, etc. etc. etc. forever. I’m not saying go back to the 1950s. I’m saying change up today’s model too.

    The other dire societal change I believe in is the fact that pants are actually AWFUL, leggings are not a suitable substitute, and science needs to come up with something more comfortable.

  33. isahassan235 July 9, 2014 at 7:46 am #

    Reblogged this on adorefashionmagazine and commented:
    if not for feminist,there wont be anybody to fight for female right

  34. Leah July 15, 2014 at 4:40 am #

    Loved this, and #2 and the image in #3 killed me. (Also the gif in “Pants” broke my spouse.) Feminism, history, and humor: excellent.

  35. shmiggen July 30, 2014 at 6:05 pm #

    People disrespect feminism because its the female equivalent of jock-itch. Look at this post: to summarize it, it is “give me stuff”. Property, votes, and stuff. There is no vision for mankind.

    • Fred_the_Dog October 19, 2014 at 4:51 pm #

      “Stuff”? What, like equal rights to vote, own property, have a job? You are a silly person.

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