Leigh Anne Tuohy Update: One Of The Teens Responds

19 Dec

One of the two teens involved in Leigh Anne Tuohy’s recent social media stunt has spoken out on Instagram (his name has been blurred out for privacy):

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Person One aka Teen Leigh Anne Tuohy approached at KFC:

Yeah people don’t know what really happened because I actually had money I have a job and have had one for over a year I was gonna pay for my brother the other guy in the picture but he was insisting on waiting on his uncle but his phone was dying so we were charging it which is the reason we were in KFC in the first place.and the game was only a 3 min walk up the street I don’t see why she said bus fare that kinda ticked me off a little but the way she worded it is making us sound less fortunate and that isn’t the case at all & when she came over to us she never mentioned her initial reason was because of her friends comment im just now finding that out

Person Two:

May I ask how she asked for the photo?

Person One:

Yeah she never actually asked for it as she was handing us the money she was like “hey you know what I think this would be a great picture” and everyone with her was yeah totally so we just kinda went along with the situation like sure why not your Michael Oher’s mom but the whole time I was thinking you know why’d she come up to us in the first place I was still clueless up until she posted the picture on social media and stated “the person with me said I bet they’re up to no good.”

I can’t imagine what it must be like to be a Black teenager, especially a boy, just trying to exist in a public space. I can’t imagine what it must be like to have to constantly wonder what white people might find threatening about you, and try to adjust your appearance and behaviour accordingly. There’s no right answer, of course – there’s no actual magic formula that Black people can apply in order to not trigger a racist reaction from a white person. It’s like trying to hit a moving target – once you think you’ve got things figured out, the earth shifts again under you and you have to add yet another must-not-do to the extensive you already have. Ijeoma Oluo recently catalogued 25 things Black People Shouldn’t Do Around Cops, and I know that this list is by no means exhaustive (nor does it just apply to cops). It seems like every day there’s something new to add to it – apparently the most recent one is “don’t charge your cell phone in KFC.”

For anyone defending Leigh Anne Tuohy, I want you to consider how absolutely mortifying this must be for those kids. Think about what it would be like to have some white woman come up and pepper you with questions about who and what you are while you’re just sitting there trying to mind your own damn business, and then think about what it would be like to wake up the next day to find your picture being used by a quasi-celebrity as some kind of race parable. Not only that, but in the picture you are being misrepresented – instead of a middle class kid trying to charge his phone, you’re a have-not case, taking charity bus fare to get to a basketball game. And now think about all the comments you get to read from racist white folks making assumptions about where you got your necklace from and why you were loitering in a KFC in the first place and you were probably just going to use that money to buy drugs like every other Black kid and look, honey, here’s a perfect example of what’s wrong with Black people today, they’re always hanging around wanting hand-outs.

All of this because you dared to be Black in public.

In response to all of the uproar, Tuohy took the haters-gonna-hate route and shared the following image on Instagram:

Screen Shot 2014-12-19 at 3.38.47 PM

I’m not here to disagree with any great Greek philosophers or anything, but I’m willing to bet that even Aristotle would have a few words to say about the value of criticism. Criticism isn’t fun, but it’s what helps us grow and learn – it challenges us to change our perspective and be better people. I’m not saying that all criticism is valid, and of course it can be challenging to figure out how to separate the wheat from the chaff when it comes to people calling you out, but it’s incredibly vital that we learn how to do so. In this case, I would really encourage Leigh Anne Tuohy to take a hot second a listen to all of the Black people explaining why her actions and words have been hurtful. Because if your end goal is racial equality, then a good starting point is treating People of Colour as equals who deserve to be heard and not just objects in need of your gracious white help.

100 Responses to “Leigh Anne Tuohy Update: One Of The Teens Responds”

  1. naturebeckles December 19, 2014 at 8:54 pm #

    ABSOLUTELY! Every word of this blog is right on point!

  2. naturebeckles December 19, 2014 at 8:54 pm #

    Reblogged this on Musings Of A Beckles.

  3. Marjorie R. Asturias December 19, 2014 at 9:01 pm #

    Reblogged this on My Life on Automattic.

  4. Lady T December 19, 2014 at 9:09 pm #

    This really pisses me off. I hate that movie (The Blind Side) and now I’ll have an easier time getting folks to understand why. I’m glad she was put on blast but I’m sad that those kids were exploited. I hope Santa delivers a big ass box of karma to Leigh Anne’s house this year.

    • allthoughtswork December 21, 2014 at 9:54 pm #

      “I hope Santa delivers a big ass box of karma”

      LOL! Good one!

      • udreamofjeanie August 17, 2015 at 2:50 am #

        I liked the ‘big ass box of karma’, too!! Do we have to pay you royalties every time we use that phrase? 👍🏼

      • allthoughtswork August 17, 2015 at 11:50 pm #

        On the house.

    • Relax! December 22, 2014 at 2:05 pm #

      Don’t be too critical or judgemental of people….no one is perfect. Being called out so publicly is ok…..no need to take things so deeply and flog a dead horse….I’m sure she’s a nice person. You wouldn’t want anyone to define you by your mistakes would you?…..you can’t all of a sudden condemn someone because of one incident. Relax. The Blind Side is a nice movie by the way. She touched a life, give her credit for it. What have u done lately?….FYI I’m black….and I don’t crack even to mean comments 🙂

      • Lady T December 22, 2014 at 6:56 pm #

        You’re black. Good for you. Is that supposed to add bonus points to your opinion? Lol. I respect your right to have an opinion. I would never tell you to relax on an issue that hits home for you. That would be dismissive. Have a good day.

  5. queer girl December 19, 2014 at 9:11 pm #

    Anyone who exploits (and/or) manufactures a moment of ‘kindness’ for personal gain is never going to get it. Maybe if we ignore her she’ll kind of go away.

    • anon December 21, 2014 at 12:09 am #

      THIS

    • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 2:41 am #

      “Anyone who exploits (and/or) manufactures a moment of ‘kindness’ for personal gain is never going to get it.”

      Love this comment! So true. I always grew up being taught that when you did nice things for people, it was tacky and classless to broadcast it. Better to enact kindness in private, instead of seeking praise and notoriety. Even if Tuohy meant to do something “kind” initially (which I seriously doubt), she sure raced over the furniture to get to her computer and tell every person she knew (and didn’t know). That in of itself is incredibly questionable.

      • udreamofjeanie August 17, 2015 at 2:53 am #

        👍🏼Absolutely!

  6. Lauren December 19, 2014 at 9:13 pm #

    Wish she had learned this lesson instead:

    Whatever lies within our power to do lies also within our power not to do.”
    ― Aristotle

    Following you now and got you listed on my blog roll over at thesomethinggarden.com. love the writing- keep it up!

  7. aqilaqamar December 19, 2014 at 9:17 pm #

    Reblogged this on Iconography ♠ Incomplete.

  8. aqilaqamar December 19, 2014 at 9:18 pm #

    I feel so bad for that teen. You are right it is so mortifying how can she just spruce things up like that :/

  9. Lady T December 19, 2014 at 9:40 pm #

    Reblogged this on Decycle My Life.

  10. Marcellina December 19, 2014 at 9:58 pm #

    “equals who deserve to be heard and not just objects in need of your gracious white help.”

    Thank you for this especially.

  11. Frosty December 19, 2014 at 10:01 pm #

    The way I see it, Leigh Anne tried do a good thing. She tried to challenge the other lady’s stereotype that two black male teens were ‘up to no good’ by finding out what they were really doing. She did invade their privacy, but she gave them compensation for it. Where she went wrong was in putting it on social media. However, everybody who spread it further needs to share a little of that blame.

    • SKNaultSheri December 19, 2014 at 10:36 pm #

      Of course, she could have challenged her friend’s stereotype without walking up to the boys and demanding answers from them.

    • Queen2Cent December 21, 2014 at 1:00 am #

      SHE LIED. NOT sure what you don’t understand about that.

    • Sahm Clerk December 21, 2014 at 1:49 pm #

      Stop seeing this as a white-black issue….. any mother with a spine would have done the same thing….. after all she was the store owner…. and why exactly would you just walk in a store to charge your phone without purchasing anything?? Or did everyone miss that? Can someone find out if the teens were actually dining in the KFC and simultaneously charging their phones??

    • Sara December 21, 2014 at 4:51 pm #

      No she suspected they were up to something. At the end of her original post she even mentioned how she learned not to judge. Then she misrepresented teens to gain more publicity. Quite shameful. I love to help others for no other reason than to do. I don’t talk down to them and I’ve never shared on social media. The act is enough without getting outwardly praise.

      • Cujo January 1, 2015 at 2:42 am #

        umm you do realize that you are belittling her actions and you suspect her intentions are for publicity. Yet still go on to call her actions shameful and talk down about her. You further more go on to make yourself more superior since you “don’t brag about helping others” (Which you yourself did brag by posting you don’t post things like that). It’s very easy to call people out on things we choose to see. Blacks are equally racist than whites. I dislike all races and religions, I judge people as individuals not as a whole.

    • Sara December 21, 2014 at 4:54 pm #

      She posted it for publicity. In original post she states she walked over to them out of suspicion and stated she learned not to judge. It’s fine to want to help others. But to belittle them out automatically assume they’re down an out because they don’t appear in a way you’d like them to be is wrong

    • allthoughtswork December 21, 2014 at 10:01 pm #

      So, it’s alright to invade someone’s privacy as long as you pay them? Who gets to decide how much a person’s privacy and dignity is worth?

      Looks like Leigh Anne assumes black kids are worth fifty cents on the dollar.

    • Zammy December 22, 2014 at 8:47 am #

      What? Tell me you are joking right?

    • ChariD December 22, 2014 at 1:22 pm #

      Did you even read anything in the post up there and let it sink in?

    • dscttt December 22, 2014 at 1:49 pm #

      She tried to challenge the other person’s stereotype (assuming that part of her story was even true) by acting on her stereotype. In the process she proved what White Privilege is, that racism isn’t just spewing hate-filled speech, and gave all of us (who choose to sit with this) a glimpse of what it is like to be a black teen in public.

    • stanley December 26, 2014 at 6:58 am #

      @ Frosty. “She did invade their privacy, but she gave them compensation for it.”

      Are you seriously kidding me, how the hell do you compensate someone for invading their privacy without their consent to begin with?
      Are you saying that her actions prior to the “compensation” are justified. there wouldn’t have been any need for compensations in the first place if she had minded her business and the only reason she “compensated” the was because she realized her assumptions and that of her friends were wrong.

    • Johnetta Kemp December 21, 2015 at 7:10 pm #

      Well said

  12. armsakimbobook December 19, 2014 at 11:44 pm #

    Reblogged this on ArmsaKimbo Blog and commented:
    Racism is overt and covert. Even assuming best intentions…

  13. armsakimbobook December 19, 2014 at 11:45 pm #

    Racism both overt and covert. Reblogged on armsakimbobook.com.

  14. katherinejlegry December 19, 2014 at 11:55 pm #

    Excellent way your follow up your first post. I wondered how the actual guys in the photo felt. Nice work investigating, Belle Jar Author.

  15. helpingu2bu December 20, 2014 at 12:39 am #

    Gnatola ma no kpon sia, eyenabe adelan to kpo mi sena. (Ewe-mina)
    A moins ce que le lion ait son propre narrateur, le chasseur aura toujours la belle part de l’histoire. (French)
    Until the lion has his or her own storyteller, the hunter will always have the best part of the story. (English)

    Ewe-mina (Benin, Ghana, and Togo) Proverb

  16. slickness December 20, 2014 at 2:07 am #

    • allthoughtswork December 22, 2014 at 6:51 am #

      See, now why did she bring up The Blind Side at all? If she’s really the colorblind, respectful person that she’s advertising herself to be, couldn’t she just have proven that by, Oh, I don’t know, BEING colorblind and respectful?

      By not singling them out in the store.
      By not putting them on the spot.
      By not announcing her authority as owner in order to intimidate them.
      By not interrogating them like hostile witnesses.
      By not treating them like children.
      By not assuming they are poor.
      By not bragging about her celebrity.
      By not referencing her religion and couching her actions in being a good Christian.
      By not asking for a group photo in such a way that would shame them if they declined.
      By not doing all this as a performance in front of her friends, not to mention an entire store full of strangers.
      By not congratulating herself on social media.
      By not posting their photo without asking their permission.
      By not implying that “other” people view them as trouble and then bragging about how evolved she is for not doing so.
      By not ignoring their hurt feelings in the aftermath and the indignity their family now has to endure thanks to the internet.
      By not being a narcissistic attention whore.

      If her racist friends (why would a colorblind champion of black youth hang out with racists?) need lessons in empathy, she should teach them on her own time, not these boy’s.

      PS: That radio interviewer needs a blow job and a Prozac.

      • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 3:04 am #

        Bravo, excellent post!

    • Lucette Smoes March 1, 2015 at 6:24 am #

      That woman had no business inviting herself to sit with the young guys, without even asking if it was alright and explaining why she was sitting there. It is clear that she was constantly imposing her will on them without giving them an opportunity of send her to hell. Even the money was imposed about them. Same thing about the picture and the dissemination of the picture. These 2 guys were too polite, not by choice.

  17. Marisol Flores December 20, 2014 at 3:39 am #

    I was hoping one of the kids would say something about this. We can all make assumptions here and there but this is clear. This is a classic case of profiling combined with someone’s overtly developed sense of importance which she feels gives her a right to butt her nose into people’s business. Trying to use the situation to make herself look good…I don’t even know what to say about that. Anyone who feels it’s ok to approach others that way to prove a point to her racist friend (or, perhaps, herself) really should take a course in empathy. Someone once approached me this way when I was a kid, and my mom let him know it was not acceptable. Any stranger who approaches my kids this way would definitely hear it from me.

    • justin December 20, 2014 at 4:41 am #

      Is there proof that this is really one of the teens?

      • Marisol Flores December 20, 2014 at 3:53 pm #

        Feel free to check it out for us. I’d love outside confirmation.

      • Brian December 20, 2014 at 7:39 pm #

        why would this be a made-up interview?

    • Sahm Clerk December 21, 2014 at 1:51 pm #

      Did everyone forget that this woman was the OWNER of the KFC??? I think this gives her the right to “butt her nose into people’s business”

      • Marisol Flores December 22, 2014 at 9:14 pm #

        Would you patronize a business where someone spoke to you that way? I wouldn’t. One of the things I appreciate about American business practices is treating customers with respect, even if they’re just people stopping by. It would probably just have been a rather awkward encounter if she hadn’t tried to make herself all saintly online. How would you like it if some random person posted pictures of your kids that way? Whether you want to call it racism or not, there’s a lack of respect and a lot of weirdness here. I’m from a big city. We leave each other alone unless asked. Maybe it’s some small town thing; whatever. Something about the situation just feels off.

      • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 3:08 am #

        I could maybe MAYBE give her an ounce of slack for asking the kids a few questions (and then, not really), but considering they were in her establishment….hmmm…maybe I could go with you on that.

        But publicly exposing their faces and personal information without them and their family’s consent? Where they do that at? LOL. That’s blasting strangers’ business all over the world wide web. Not acceptable.

      • Lucette Smoes March 1, 2015 at 6:27 am #

        Absolutely not. You don’t give up your privacy when you enter a KFC.

  18. Rachel December 20, 2014 at 10:54 am #

    Aristotle didn’t say that. It is not one of his philosophies.

    • Roberto December 20, 2014 at 9:19 pm #

      That quote is by Elbert Hubbard, not Aristotle.

    • roberto December 20, 2014 at 9:21 pm #

      That’s right. The quote is by Elbert Hubbard, not Aristotle.

  19. TheTruthHurts December 20, 2014 at 5:34 pm #

    Perhaps a more effective way to fight stereotypes of poor, stupid black people and protest exploitation would involve learning how to use punctuation.

    • Julie December 21, 2014 at 12:09 am #

      You know, because I’m a teacher and I’ve done a lot of proofreading, the lack of punctuation jumped out at me right away. I wondered if anyone was going to mention it. I found it surprisingly easy to read and understand, though. It was very informal, and it was like I could hear his actual voice. Maybe it’s because I’m used to seeing writing like this. I work at a community college, and I see this kind of writing by black, white, old, and young. At least the phone corrected any of his possible misspellings. I did notice and appreciate his use of quotation marks.

    • AMM December 22, 2014 at 11:27 am #

      “Perhaps a more effective way to fight stereotypes of poor, stupid black people and protest exploitation would involve learning how to use punctuation.”

      Because someone not using punctuation in a medium known for relaxed writing styles totally justifies treating them as less than human.

      BTW, there’s a word for putting the onus upon black people to dispell the racist stereotypes imposed upon them by white people: it’s called racism.

  20. Glenn December 20, 2014 at 6:52 pm #

    “there’s no actual magic formula that Black people can apply in order to not trigger a racist reaction from a white person.”

    Not to mention, that’s not even their responsibility. ‘Don’t trigger the racists, and don’t be “asking for it” by dressing like a “thug” either.’

    • Brian December 20, 2014 at 7:37 pm #

      Racists hate a person’s skin…has nothing to do with the way they dress…

    • Coach December 22, 2014 at 5:48 am #

      Glenn…the only thing that makes their dress, as dressing like a “thug” is their skin! Go back and take a closer look at the teens dress and ask yourself…how did I come up with dressing like a thug? When did thugs start wearing crosses? I took a close look at what they are wearing and see things being sold in America to all our teen, black or white!!! God bless you Glenn.

    • allthoughtswork December 22, 2014 at 6:54 am #

      Sounds familiar: “Of course you got raped, dearie, you were just asking for it with that blouse.”

  21. Ralph Byrns December 20, 2014 at 9:44 pm #

    I was first accused of “reverse” racism in about 1961 when, after seeing a 5-year-old trying to mount a mechanical horse in front of a grocery store, I hoisted the kid up for a ride while his mom shopped. The kid was “black”, and my friend said something to me (we’re both “Caucasians) about how I would not have done this if the kid had been “white.” Baloney. It was a penny, and the kid wanted to ride. Anyone who suggests that common kindness invariably reflects condescension or patriarchy or somesuch needs to look inside themselves. Can kindness be condescending. Sure. Happened to me when I was 12 and a nun assumed that because I didn’t have nice clothes, that I needed help from her. I resented it. Can kindness be misconstrued? Sure. But folks should not jump to conclusions based on any single event. I resented the nun, but her concern was understandable. Was Ms. Tuohy motivated by racism? Jumping at that conclusion is unfair to her. We all need to extend to each other a little consideration. Assuming the worst is unfair.

  22. lekdjie mumet-ndhase.com December 21, 2014 at 8:00 am #

    oh,racism again..

    very lucky,i was born and live in indonesia,the place of unity in diversity…

    visit mumet-ndhase.com

  23. Megan Flemmit December 21, 2014 at 3:51 pm #

    Reblogged this on Journ Kid.

  24. dawnwink December 21, 2014 at 3:59 pm #

    Thank you for this insight and Voice. Beautifully and powerfully conveyed.

  25. Lauren December 21, 2014 at 4:17 pm #

    Reblogged this on the something garden and commented:
    Annnnd the follow up, proving that Anne at thebellejar.com was spot fucking on!

  26. Alex December 21, 2014 at 5:58 pm #

    These are from the moms involved in the situation. Leigh Anne is ignoring them both. I’m not sure how to help them, other than getting their voices out/contacting the media. (These posts are from instagram and FB.)

    • Lady T December 23, 2014 at 12:03 am #

      Wow!

    • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 5:50 am #

      WOW. Thank you for posting these here! They’re the ONLY opinions that matter. These mothers.

      Anyone who could still look at their hurt and offense and try to fix their mouths (or their fingers) in defense of Leigh Anne Tuohy, is utterly, bewilderingly, biased and disrespectful.

      • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 5:52 am #

        I wish they could sue this woman. The public embarrassment Miz Leigh Anne caused these families….she ought to be deeply ashamed of herself.

  27. Ashley December 21, 2014 at 6:33 pm #

    I feel that her initial reasoning for wanting to help them was very wrong, and assuming that they’re less fortunate. She felt as of she was doing a favor, when the favor wasn’t needed. Now, about her Aristotle post, I feel like it’s saying that you’re never going to stop being criticized, but if you never want criticism, then you should do nothing, which will lead you to say nothing, which would then make you be NOTHING. In my opinion, I think that the post is true. And even if you were follow to steps that Aristotle wrote, you’re STILL going to be criticized for being NOTHING. You will always have those who will criticize, but it’s not about everybody else.

    • wheatfreesandy December 23, 2014 at 6:22 am #

      Why would she assume that? They were well-dressed young men. Nothing in the pic would possibly indicate that she (or anyone) would think they were poor black boys. But keep on repeating the pathetic race-baiting narrative, as if it justifies yours and everyone else who wants to use these two young men to foster paranoia, hatred, and anger.

      Just Maybe she is simply a really a nice person that just wanted to let them know she appreciated the fact that they were kind of star-struck with her (the one teen said they were excited to meet her and felt it was unreal, because they really liked the movie about her) and, obviously, looked up to her as a role-model/celebrity of sorts. (Ooops, can’t have that, now can we, because she’s merely a white woman and not a woman of color.). People working in fast food see Everything on a daily basis, could it be that she was happy they recognized her (according to the video interview/account of a totally irresponsible radio interviewer)? Could it really just be that she truly wanted to deflate the narrative of the other woman making invalid assumptions about two black teens just hanging out?? Assumptions are just that–they are more often than not incorrect, and make an ass out of the one assuming.

  28. tapati December 21, 2014 at 8:56 pm #

    I made a point in response to her post of the photo that I’d be upset if someone posted a photo of my kids without my permission and people rushed to say “Oh I’m sure she talked to them.” Apparently not. It would be great if she can listen and learn from this and not carry this kind of behavior forward.

    • wheatfreesandy December 23, 2014 at 6:33 am #

      H E L L O!!! ??? They were a couple of star-struck teens meeting the woman they considered a role model in a movie they watched about her that they really liked. They consented to the pic, according to the video of the radio interview by some race-baiting hater I listened to. Even though the one teen says he didn’t realize his pic would be plastered on fb, it’s unfathomable to believe because All teens know in this day and age that digital pics will wind up on facebook-they have a cell phone, after all, that I’m sure they check facebook with every few minutes–in fact that is why they were in the KFC–to charge up a cell phone! Ooops! they, obviously, don’t realize it’s a sin to hold a white woman up as any kind of role model, with them being black and all, but their jealous Mom is taking care of that, along with the angry race-baiting radio interviewer. It was the only way she could be sure they just might see it, as they were excited to meet her. Must you choose to believe the worst because you are being baited to do so?? No good deed goes unpunished & all that, after all, right?? Y’all read too much into it and see what you want to see in order to justify your anger and further the white supremacy narrative…and deepen the divide in this nation.

      • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 5:56 am #

        Now you’re calling the young man’s mother, who is rightfully upset at not being asked for consent to use a picture of her own son, “jealous”? Oh my God, really? Is this what the defense of Tuohy has come to? I’m stunned.

      • wheatfreesandy January 21, 2015 at 8:36 pm #

        Stunned? Get over yourself. That some of us can see it for what it is, instead of buying into the ‘Self-Serving White Savior’ narrative put out here by a racist blogger looking to stir the pot in order to gain a following for the continuation of his/her racist BS should be common-sense, and not ‘stunning’ at all.

      • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 6:01 am #

        Why can’t these families’ feelings simply be accepted and respected? Leigh Anne Tuohy’s intentions, as good as they may have been (or not been), doesn’t trump everything and everybody. I mean, my goodness!

  29. allthoughtswork December 21, 2014 at 9:04 pm #

    If I may dabble in some self-congratulatory gloating, I KNEW I had that ridiculous woman pegged right. I use this term rarely but advisedly: what a bitch.

    Stepping on innocent heads to get a higher seat in the Good Christian Bleachers ain’t how it works, Leigh Anne. Belittling someone artificially to make yourself look gracious for “helping” them is just sick.

    Tuohy must be massively insecure.

    • sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 6:03 am #

      And looking for another twenty minutes of fame. Apparently, her movie wasn’t good enough for her.

      • allthoughtswork December 25, 2014 at 4:18 pm #

        Apparently not. I feel sorry for her family.

  30. allthoughtswork December 21, 2014 at 10:09 pm #

    Hmm…would Leigh Anne have treated two full grown black men this way in her KFC?

    Hellllll, no. She picks her prey carefully. But I’d LOVE to see video of that bottle blonde little hypocrite trying.

    • Lady T December 23, 2014 at 12:05 am #

      Say that!

    • wheatfreesandy December 23, 2014 at 6:48 am #

      Hmmmm….I’m not a racist being in a mixed-race black-on-white family that I Love dearly & all, but y’all are working overtime here to make me think I am. Here’s a serious question…What benefit is that to anyone?? Will it make you feel better or justify your anger if I buy into your narrative? Sorry, but the narrative doesn’t fit…and there are more of us out here than you think. In fact, there are millions of us out here who are not buying into the ‘you should be the angry black woman/man’ narrative. Demonizing others you don’t know in order to justify the narrative and it’s often incorrect assumptions (whether it’s the newer black or long-held white narrative) only makes you a legend in your own mind, whether you are black, white, yellow, red, etc. and doesn’t heal anything or anyone, let alone the society we live in.

  31. izzy82 December 21, 2014 at 10:28 pm #

    Thanks for the original post and this follow up! The comments on the first post were overall so disheartening but with this follow up post, I’m finding the comments to be much more heartening and by people who truly get white supremacy!!

  32. Canyon raine December 22, 2014 at 6:34 pm #

    It is people like you who exaggerbate the situation. Don’t give it attention. Social media is filled with the retellimg of “racist” encounters like this which serve no purpose other than to further divide this country. Shame on you!

    • mgpcoe December 22, 2014 at 8:16 pm #

      The country is already divided. There’s just more and more light on the divide.

      • wheatfreesandy December 23, 2014 at 6:50 am #

        …thanks to the pathetic self-serving race-baiters among us who profit from deepening the divide.

  33. Nick Webb December 22, 2014 at 8:14 pm #

    Let me start off by saying that I’m totally against racial profiling, but your article is absolutely ridiculous and I think I lost some valuable brain cells reading it.

    First of all, it’s her fucking store. If anyone, regardless of race, is sitting there and loitering she has a right to approach them and ask what they’re doing. They’re on HER property and she has every right to ask what they’re doing. She did not invade their privacy, because when you go on to property owned by someone else, your business is literally their business. (Not saying this gives business-owners the right to harass customers by any means, but they can inquire about the nature of their visit).

    Second of all, how do you know she was “at the very least going to call the cops?”

    Third of all, if you’re going to try and make a legitimate opinion… why the fuck would you refer to her as Leigh Anne “I Adopted A Black Boy So I Can’t Possibly Be Racist” Tuohy. I mean seriously?

    Did the person Tuohy was talking to racially profile these two men? Probably, yes. But Tuohy had every right to approach them and talk with them. It’s her store and if patrons are sitting at tables not ordering anything, she can inquire about it. If she truly was racist, why the fuck would she give them money, food and bus fare to go the game?

  34. mike Ormond December 22, 2014 at 10:03 pm #

    There is an awful lot of self-righteous anger expressed in these comments. I agree that Ms Toughy is naive and insensitively oblivious to the implications of her “well intended-self-aggrandizing” actions. She does have much to consider. However, “black anger” may also cause some black folk to misconstrue the speech and actions of white people as well. Misunderstanding is a two way street.

  35. lisavallejos December 23, 2014 at 3:38 am #

    Reblogged this on Lisa Vallejos.

  36. Siki Dlanga December 23, 2014 at 5:56 am #

    Reblogged this on MadameMadiba.

  37. Siki Dlanga December 23, 2014 at 6:06 am #

    Great article! That quote says “I’m unrepentant.” She’s still on her high horse and unwilling to change. She’s probably done something like that many times and she’s been applauded for it. Now she can’t believe she’s not the nice white person the world believed she was. This is however her opportunity to experience something new and authentic, something with depth rather than superficial. This is her moment. It is unfortunately public now. She made herself public.

  38. sepiaroses December 25, 2014 at 2:36 am #

    WELL, that, as they say, is that. Let anyone try to defend that patronizing, lying woman’s irresponsible actions now. 🙂

  39. Kennedy December 26, 2014 at 1:12 am #

    Eh, she didn’t profile the kids, her friend did. If her friend never made the comment then Tuohy wouldn’t have done anything. She went and asked them questions in a (albeit misguided) attempt to prove to her friend that profiling is wrong, then posted the picture to Instagram to broadcast the anti-profiling message to her fans.

    Black male teenager here, and going out in public really isn’t that bad, knowing that cases like these are far and away the exception, not the rule. I wouldn’t be at all scared if a tiny white lady came and started asking me questions. A cop is one thing, but I’d only be confused if a woman started asking me questions randomly, especially so if I recognized her as Leigh Anne Tuohy. I’d be mildly mad if I saw our picture on Instagram later without my consent, but I think “mortified” is hugely exaggerating. Systematic racism is a present and awful thing than manifests itself in terrible ways, but citing a misguided, not malicious, attempt at disproving stereotypes feels petty when there are innocent kids being shot in the streets, and you’re lumping in “loitering in a KFC” which caused this, with the whole “things you shouldn’t do near cops” which caused, well, deaths.

    I don’t think we should be pissed at Tuohy (maybe her friend for the comment) but, instead give her the benefit of the doubt. She obviously meant well, and so many people are making her out to be a villain, no wonder she’s not listening to criticism because so much of it is so mean spirited. Praise the fact that she disagrees with racial profiling and broadcasted that message, but compassionately criticize her methods, keeping in mind that not everyone is as keenly socially aware or intelligent as you are.

  40. Petrossa December 26, 2014 at 11:16 am #

    “The most common gun violence, by contrast, is drearily predictable and is the source on average of nearly ten thousand homicides a year. Such violence occurs overwhelmingly in certain locations of cities—over the past 30 years in Boston, for example, 75 percent of the city’s shootings occurred in 4.5% of its area, whereas 88.5 percent of the city’s street segments experienced not a single shooting. Urban shootings are retaliatory or the product of the most trivial of slights. They are committed by handguns, not assault rifles. Victims and perpetrators usually know each other, absent bullets going astray. Reforming the involuntary commitment laws and beefing up mental health services are largely irrelevant to these shootings, since though the shooters have serious problems with impulse control and are clearly a danger to themselves and others, few would be deemed mentally ill. And both victims and perpetrators are disproportionately minority, by huge margins. New York City is emblematic of the country’s gun violence. According to victims and witnesses, blacks commit 80% of all shootings in New York, though they are 23% of the city’s residents. Add Hispanics and you account for 98% of all shootings. Whites commit a little over 1% of shootings, though they are 35% of the city’s population. These disproportions pertain across the country.”

    I guess being ‘racist’ is just common sense

  41. cece December 26, 2014 at 1:47 pm #

    what is all the negative comments about this woman, she only did the same thing that she did to Michael so what are you bitching about, she diffused a situation that could have been blown out of order. For all the Black women that have Black son we should kind of be glad that there is somebody that is on this earth that has the open mind that she does. I think had they been white, and the bitch that said they were up to know good, she would have done the same thing. I do not think this was a publicity stunt, because if so she would have done it long before now. Let this woman do her job she might be a God sent we do not know. What I do know is that she is in the business for helping our black boys so let her, because all the white men white laws white male anything, they are trying to make the black man extinct and it is happening right before our eyes. My name is Conice? Now what!! We need to open our eye and look at the big picture, we need her as a voice because ours voices are silent to criminal justice system because it is JUST-US that are dying.(our black boys)

  42. cece December 26, 2014 at 2:01 pm #

    also we are jumping on the band wagon to put her down but no one has anything about the real racist, the bitch that made mention of the boys being up to no good. Talk about that trick she was the problem because had she not raised the attention to the boys Leighann would have never gotten involved, Like Really

  43. Tania Bronzeberg January 1, 2015 at 12:45 am #

    Harassment of women must be reduced in Canada!

    Misogyny is a problem in Canada.
    A female school administrator of the Toronto District School Board
    was verbally harassed on the phone by one of the misogynist men.

    Women should not be oppressed by such chauvinst men. Men must learn to respect women.

  44. Holly January 10, 2015 at 10:45 pm #

    Lord. What she did to these two young men, talk about being Blindsided!

  45. wheatfreesandy January 21, 2015 at 8:31 pm #

    Pardon my ignorance in this social media forum, but How do I unsub from getting my inbox blown-up by this black racist pot-stirrer and his/her racist followers who take a positive encounter for the boys and turn it into an over-exaggerated, pot-stirring, negative in order to fit the blogger’s ‘White Savior Complex’ narrative that so many of y’all are buying into?

  46. udreamofjeanie August 17, 2015 at 2:48 am #

    Wow! The words that really clicked were ‘minding your own business’ & winding up on social media’. That’s all one would have to do. Just put yourself in those young men’s’ places. How would that make you feel?
    Thank you!

  47. Marcus Ford December 27, 2015 at 2:54 am #

    It would have been so bad had she just owned up to what she did instead of selling those kids down the river to protect her own white savior status. This woman is trash and figures just because she adopted one as her pet that they’re all her pets. foh

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