All The Gratitude

28 Apr

The past year or so has been a struggle for my family. We had bedbugs for most of 2014, and even though our building’s property management company paid for the bi-weekly sprayings, getting rid of them completely drained our savings account. We had to wash and re-wash every piece of clothing and linen in the house, and every spraying meant hauling our two cats in a cab to a friend’s house because obviously it’s not a great idea to have animals on hand when you’re spreading deadly chemicals around. Sprayings also meant eating out a lot, since we weren’t allowed back in the apartment for several hours after they were completed. On top of that, there were lots of little problems we (perhaps unwisely) threw money at to make them go away. Turns out having bedbugs is a pretty expensive gig! Who knew?

So now we’re kind of broke. I work a bunch of jobs and my husband works full time, but the cost of Toronto rent plus Toronto daycare is making it challenging to get by. We’ve bounced a couple of rent cheques in the past few months, a fact that that 100% makes me feel like not-a-grownup. And speaking of broke, yesterday I broke my phone because I’m a total ding dong. It was one of those things where I was really tired and it slipped out of my hands and also let’s be real it was already cracked a bunch because apparently I am clumsy, and now the screen is full of colourful lines and I can’t unlock it. It’s hard for me to work when I don’t have a phone, because use it to tether when I can’t be at home and don’t have access to wifi, and also, you know, part of my work is tweeting, talking to people, updating The Belle Jar’s FB page, etc.

So I made a Patreon account last night. This is something that I’ve been thinking about for a while, because writing isn’t a super lucrative job. Especially when most of your writing is feminist analysis. I felt weird about asking for money, but, you know, it was just that – asking. I didn’t want anyone to feel obligated to do anything; I just wanted to give them the option to donate if that was something they were into. I do lots of work for free, and I figured that maybe people wanted to help me continue doing that work.

I woke up this morning to find that over night I had gained over $100 a month in donations. That number has now grown to $188 per month. I am so fucking humbled. I don’t even know what to say, other than thank you thank you thank you. I had no idea whether this would work because hey, why buy the cow when you can get the feminist analysis for free, right? But you guys have come through and then some.

So thank you. I cannot say that enough. Thank you. Thank you to everyone who donated, but also thank you to everyone who shows up, everyone who reads my stuff, everyone who takes the time to comment and share and click-to-like. Thank you from the bottom of my filthy little heart. Whenever I find myself wondering what the point is of shouting my claptrap out into the void, I remember you guys, and that makes it all worth doing. Thank you.

If you want to donate to my Patreon account, you can find it here:

You can donate a little as a dollar a month, which is RAD. Unfortunately, the platform doesn’t allow for one-time donations, which some people prefer (for obvious reasons). If that’s something you really want to do, you can message me through the Belle Jar’s FB page and I’ll give you my email address. But if you can’t or don’t want to donate, no sweat. I just appreciate you for being here and reading my stuff.

Much love,


Photo on 2015-04-28 at 2.54 PM

11 Responses to “All The Gratitude”

  1. ilmondoinbellezza April 28, 2015 at 7:17 pm #

    thank you.congratulations for your blog

  2. ItalianHurricane April 29, 2015 at 2:12 pm #

    I love your blog, I hope mine can get as cool as yours one day. Hugs 🙂

  3. Lynda M O April 29, 2015 at 3:28 pm #

    We should be allowed to toss some coin your way if that’s what moves us !~! Thank you for making it easy to do so. Your opinions are valid, well-thought-out and cogent.

  4. Miya April 29, 2015 at 4:18 pm #

    Understand your plight and am also going through a financial myself. Thanks for you blog and continual insights – hugs!

  5. cllgarrison April 30, 2015 at 12:57 am #

    Weird, I just posted about my bedbug experience a few days ago. We brought them home from the hospital when our baby was born. So I had the stress of trying to breastfeed my first baby, sleep deprivation, and lovely bedbugs. Luckily we live in a house so they weren’t a recurring problem really. It was very expensive though. I definitely feel your struggle! Keep working hard like you do and you’ll make it all back soon.

  6. Treeswallow April 30, 2015 at 6:22 pm #

    When I was a little kid, my mom used to inspect motel rooms before signing the register. I believe she was looking for signs of bedbugs. May have to start doing that again.
    I hear that the latest thing in bedbug treatments is heat. Bedbugs have developed resistance to chemicals, but not to high temperatures, e.g. 140 F. It’s supposed to be safer (no chemical residue), and more effective. They can’t hide from it. Heat will get the bugs wherever they are, so one treatment is supposed to do the job. Requires caulking cracks, if there are any, so the heat doesn’t escape, but that’s worth doing anyway to keep heating / cooling bills down.

  7. teacentral :) May 6, 2015 at 7:53 am #

    There is also GoFundMe where you CAN receive one time donations. Thinking about you.

  8. pllanalia May 7, 2015 at 12:26 am #

    Your welcome ……

  9. kimlhine May 7, 2015 at 11:30 pm #

    I am enjoying your blog so much, so I nominated you for an award, I’m not sure if you love’em or hate ’em so if you want to accept it visit here:

  10. nurizzati233012 June 9, 2015 at 5:14 am #


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